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Dated 11 April 2010: Picking sides in the Angel Beats! war

Otonashi and Yuri
Potato-kun Otonashi and Yuri flirt some more.

I can't fight the hype. All the Angel Beats! talk, both for and against (mostly against) made me curious enough to watch it just to see how derivative it really is and find out whether or not Jun Maeda really is a snow-cancer-writing hack. Full-page Haruhi palette swaps aside, Angel Beats! isn't really any more derivative than most anime. You can't tell me there aren't shitloads of cookie-cutter shows every season.

Iwasawa and Yuri
Yuri introduces Iwasawa, Otonashi's enlistment bonus.

My biggest problem with Angel Beats! is I have zero faith in Yuri. I'd follow Haruhi on an ill-conceived Crusade any day of the week, but Yuri is just going to get soldiers killed for cafeteria food someday—even though they are already dead so they won't die if they are killed.

Shiina
Shiina tries really hard to be goth even though
she has to wear a school uniform in Hell.

On the other hand, were I caught in the Angel Beats! battlespace with my loyalty up for grabs, I'd be fully on board with whatever Tenshi orders. Take that hill? Buff that floor? Clear that building? Police call all these God damn meal coupons and NPC condom wrappers? Got it, ma'am. I'm all over it. Whatever it takes to not be on Yuri's side with the rest of those yahoos, deadbeats, and douchebags. Hell, I'd be pissed enough the afterlife means being stuck in a Japanese high school until the career counselor turns me into a barnacle on Mio's side of Tsumugi's boat. Might as well stick a feather in my cap and join up with the winning side.

Yuri
Poser Haruhi

VERSUS

Tenshi
The Shrike.

Dude, this is a no-brainer.