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24 June 2016: Bakuon!! turned out to be the best show from Spring 2016

Yume and Hane
Hane gets by with help from her reliable imouto.

I was expecting to enjoy Bakuon!! on general principle, but I'm still surprised to see it at the top of my Spring 2016 rankings. Silly and a little irreverent, Bakuon!! is a charming show about high school girls who really like motorcycles. If you've seen much anime, you're surely familiar with the "girls really enjoy this thing" brand of moé pandering. For example, K-On! did this with guitars, GIRLS und PANZER did this with tanks, and Ore no Imouto ga Konnani Kawaii Wake ga Nai did this with incest.

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18 June 2016: High School Fleet finally gets something right

Hiromi
The last thing you'll see before Hiromi sumos the fuck out of you.

I've been fairly hostile towards Haifuri (High School Fleet) all season long. The problem is that, as military-otaku bait, it's completely ate up. It sort of tries to cater to that crowd, but it goes about it in a half-assed sort of way. Unfortunately, the season-long plot, mystery, and ongoing crisis are serious enough that I feel Haifuri needed to get its paramilitary parts right.

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11 June 2016: I don't even know how long sea slugs normally live

Sea Slug Team
Wait, what happens to the mascot? Is Kabitzin going to throw her out into the street?

Whenever some anime blog called it quits after three or four years of frantic, enthusiastic activity, I used to crack that it was just another flash in the pan. But, truth be told, four years is a really long time to maintain an active anime blog. However, ever since I found myself in the dubious position of (I'm pretty sure, at least) being the oldest currently active English language anime blog in the known universe, I haven't really kept up with all the ones that have come and gone.

Blogsuki
Blogsuki is on the Twitter and even has an anime avatar (if you remember).

However, Sea Slug Team was one of the old old anime blogs, so it's sad to see it go. Once Kabitzin started rotating in new writers, I guess I just sort of assumed the blog could go on indefinitely by regularly seeking out new blood. Hell, I don't even remember who the original members were anymore. I'm pretty sure Kabitzin was one of them, and not just the site's current Dread Pirate Roberts.

Tokyo Jupiter
Tokyo Jupiter is also on the Twitter, but doesn't write about anime nearly as much.

So who's left among the pre-Cosprayers anime blogs? Blogsuki is still active, although perhaps not as prolific as it once was "back in the day." Speaking of which, I also can't remember what Blogsuki was called in the past. I'm pretty sure the name and URL changed at least once, though. Tokyo Jupiter is technically still around, although not on the original domain anymore, not strictly an anime blog either, and hasn't updated in more than two years. I can tell I've been doing this too long when I think "27 months without an update isn't that long."


7 June 2016: Surprising no one, GIRLS und PANZER der FILM is awesome

GIRLS und PANZER der FILM Blu-rays
The OVA epilogue is also pretty good even though it's not wall-to-wall tank battles.

If you watched the GIRLS und PANZER television series, then you've probably been anxiously waiting to watch GIRLS und PANZER der FILM. Since its release in November 2015, this movie continues to print money for Japanese theaters even though the Blu-ray came out at the end of May 2016. Now that I've finally gotten to see it, the reasons for the film's success and unflagging popularity are obvious.

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27 May 2016: Wake Me Up Asuna gets a new free outfit but no new punctuation

Asuna
Birth control glasses.

Just a few observations now that I've been using the Wake Me Up Asuna app for over a month. It really can fail for no apparent reason. It's only happened once, but that's pretty unreliable for an alarm clock. Hence the need for its prominent disclaimers and warnings, I guess. It also can go batshit crazy and drain your battery out of nowhere. That's only happened once too, and I haven't been able to reproduce the bug. The real news is—aside from the initial nag—Asuna hasn't pestered me to buy her any new clothes, and now there's even a new free outfit, shown above.

I get the feeling we're only a few years away from a wave of digital assistants, probably something like the Amazon Echo combined with a Cortana that's more like the Halo version than the Windows version. I'm hoping for a Yui voiced by a synthesized Ito Kanae—a Yui that will randomly crash the fuck out of my SMRT-HOEM with erratic bugs. The future's gonna be awesome.


20 May 2016: At least there aren't any icebergs in Haifuri

Akeno
Why aren't you on the bridge?

Nova addressed this in his indictment of Misaki's incompetence through five episodes of Haifuri (High School Fleet). I'm happy to pile on because she didn't fare any better in episode six. Misaki has absolutely no business being captain of her little boat and really just needs to throw herself overboard to save everyone else the trouble.

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12 May 2016: Chocolate good enough to steal, but apparently not good enough to buy

Meiji chocolate bar
You can also buy them over the Internet, but good luck getting one that hasn't melted.

I spotted a Meiji chocolate bar at an Asian supermarket and immediately recognized it as the confection Airi's father from Boku dake ga Inai Machi (ERASED) tried to steal, ruining his life in the process and causing little Airi to grow up in a broken home.

Chocolate
According to Detective Conan, shoplifters turn to murder next.

It tasted pretty good, but really not delicious enough to throw your life away for it. For reference, it's not as good as the Galaxy or Cadbury chocolate bars from the United Kingdom, but it's definitely better than a Hershey bar from the United States.

P.S. Spoilers, I guess.


6 May 2016: We can't stop here, this is kabane country

Mumei
Go on, Mumei. Curse the bitch out.

The best anime this season is a steampunk show about cowardly idiots and assholes on a train getting killed by zombies. This is not to say that Koutetsujou no Kabaneri (Kabaneri of the Iron Fortress) doesn't have problems, 'cause it's got a mess o' problems, but they're the sort of thing I'm happy to overlook as long as all the right people keep getting fucked up. (See also the second half of Shiki, another noitaminA show, in fact.)

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